Anonymous asked: Because I have no life, I was browsing the notable alumni section of the Occidental wikipedia page and was super stoked to see your name. You see, that's where I'm attending college in the Fall. (where I will probably continue to read too much Cracked) Anyway, the fact that you went there makes me even more excited and most likely disillusioned about my upcoming collegiate experience.
I don’t know why you would sent this anonymously. I’m happy to talk to you about Occidental. It’s an awesome school.
Anonymous asked: will u marry me
What’s your credit score like?
Anonymous asked: So I had a dream last night. I joined the cast of After Hours. And there was an ongoing dramatic subplot. And we were filming in part of the International Space Station. You had a little baby son named Toronto. So my questions are: 1) Would you name your son Toronto? 2) Would you ever want to film After Hours IN SPACE? 3) Is there a dramatic subplot tying the episodes together that fans aren't aware of yet? 4) Can I join the cast?
All good questions.
1) I would never name my son Toronto unless Gwyneth Paltrow was carrying the child and she was particularly insistent, which I could imagine she might be.
2) No. My water glass is my crutch in that show and it would get everywhere.
3) Yes… But it won’t make any sense until one of us dies in real life.
4) Yes, when one of us dies in real life. Probably then.
Don’t worry, Library of Congress, I’ll hold onto this one.
Thanks, wimp.com. This made my day.
Josh Ritter does narrative songs better than just about anyone.