December 2011
14 posts
This Dan O'Brien: Getting Hit By a Car: A... →
thisdanobrien:
Hey World,
Last Monday, I got hit by a car and immediately wrote an article about it.
On Friday morning, that article was published on Cracked.
Then I left New Jersey and the internet behind for an annual, three-day mini-vacation, to a cabin in the mountains of Pennsylvania with around ten of…
See?! Dan if fucking fine. Everybody get back to work paying attention to me.
Dear Lexus December to Remember Sales Event,
How did you get inside my head? I found you there this morning, humming a classic rock song and going through my things. I don’t remember taking you home, I don’t even remember meeting you. I only saw you in my peripherals, singing over my friends’ voices or the top of Newsweek. But I woke up saying your name as though you were part of my life, part of my vocabulary, like any other word I use...
Marlo from The Wire Is Doomed to Forever Be Marlo...
Two days ago I wrote a column about your new favorite lacrosse movie. If you haven’t rushed out to see A Warrior’s Heart in select theaters I promise right now that it will be life-changingly bad.
It was made by Xenon Pictures, a production house which, thanks to my keen journalistic whiffery, I suspected might have other piles of shit laying around on DVD. A quick perusal of their website...
Watchcracked:
Rick Perry’s Really Gay Creekside Christmas Party
YouTube took our Rick Perry video down again, so here it is in our own video player so you can watch it whenever and forever. We will not remove it. It only took YouTube an hour to remove it the second time. We are baffled by this for two reasons, one being that we know that thousands of people have already flagged the original video,...
I’m a strong believer that narrative fiction...
November 2011
1 post
A Poem About Shooting People and Riding Horses
I won’t be doing a column this week so I thought I’d offer something else instead.
I recently promised to write a poem to the person who helped me reach $600 in Movember donations. Since then I’ve accumulated more than I need, so in retrospect it was pointless. I was impressed with how quickly people responded so I’m going to try it again, this time with some bait.
I...
November 2010
3 posts
Mint Royale Music Video →
If you like the Mighty Boosh, you will love this video. Probably, I honestly have no idea what you like.
How I Saved Thanksgiving →
I dug this one up from the vault but it predates my column at Cracked. I thought it would nice to share today.
Beating Back the Naysayers
First off, let me welcome you to my blog. It would be rude of me not to at least acknowledge that this is your first time here, so please make yourself at home. I am proud to both be writing this and to have you here. Sadly, not everyone practices the same social grace.
Now, you may know that I am fighting a bitter war against other people’s cancer. I am growing a mustache for Movember and...
